I'm Afraid I Have Wasted His Money Then Prayed About Helping His People

Day 5:  I'm Afraid I have Wasted His Money then Prayed about Helping His People

Brace yourself, this might hurt a little.

I was sitting at church at our revival meeting, listening to the announcements.  I don't know about your church, but we do ours at the end of the service.  When they are over, an usher prays, the offering is taken and simultaneously someone sings "special" music.  Well, call me pagan, but usually around that time, my stomach is speaking to me in it's prayer language.  I click my phone screen on to check and see how late we are running, and roll my eyes in angst because once again, every church is going to beat us to the Cracker Barrel.  In case you are wondering, the phone I click on is a Samsung Galaxy 5.  I then noticed my french manicure nails....not your normal french manicure....the usual white tip is a sparkly purple tip that matches my toes, all done at my most recent mani/pedi appointment. I smiled to myself, loving how shiny and pretty my nails are.  Thats when I remembered that my nail tech said they are getting a new pink sparkle in....and I inwardly squealed in delight at how cute my nails are going to look next time.  Now my stomach's prayer language had increased to where others could hear it....and my mouth watered at the thought of the ribeye, mashed potatoes and house salad (the one with cheese, bacon and croutons) that I was going to eat.  Suddenly, my thoughts were re-captured into announcement time.  The preacher was encouraging us to include in our offering a special gift for our speaker, Dr. Robert Smith.  Now you need to know that one of my favorite preachers ever, is Dr. Smith.  His grasp of scripture and ability with words allows him to paint verbal pictures from the Bible....listening to him is an amazing experience and always exciting....I spend most of the message feeling the need to crawl under the pew from conviction.  My life has truly been changed from hearing him speak "God" to me.  So, when our preacher said that we needed to include a special gift for Dr. Smith, I immediately thought that I should talk to the Lord about that.  First I looked in my Coach purse and Coach wallet to see if I had any cash on me, I didn't, but I knew I could give on line.  So, I sat there, in my pew...and started praying in my heart and mind.  "Lord, please give me direction about if I should give a gift to Dr. Smith....and how much you would want me to give." I didn't get done in time for when the plate passed me, but no worries, I knew I could do it at the next service.

That afternoon, after I was full from biscuits and steak, I laid on the couch for a few minutes and started flipping thru my Direct TV channels on our 65" television.  There was one of those "Feed the Children" commercials on.  You know the one...the one that says, "For the price of a cup of coffee....you could feed a child for a week".  I'm ashamed to say that I actually laughed inside because the coffee price he gave that could feed a child for a week was remarkably less than I spend on my Starbucks coffee.  I joked with myself thinking, "For the price I spend on a coffee, I could feed the child for 6 months".  At that very moment, literally....it felt like the Holy Spirit jumped on me with conviction.  The passage where Jesus asks Peter if he loves Him and Peter answers yes....and Jesus says, "Then feed my sheep."  Peter and Jesus repeat this three times in that passage.  I know that there is a spiritual application about "spiritually feeding" people....but what if Jesus meant it literally....as in feed....or give food....to His people.  His people like Dr Smith.....His people like these hungry little children.  The conviction was so heavy as I realized I had decided to pray over how much to give Dr. Smith.....and how much to give those hungry little children.  The conviction wasn't over the prayer about how much if any, to give...it was from the realization of what I had not prayed about.

I had never prayed about whether or not I should use the money God entrusted me with to get my nails done.  I never asked God if I should His money to buy a Coach purse rather than a less expensive one.  There has never been a prayer said about going to a restaurant (well except for the ones from my children begging God to send me home from work so we could eat dinner).  It never occurred to me to pray over whether or not my family needed satellite television...or WiFi..at my house, that's a necessity like electric and water.  When I spend His money on me....I don't pray about it.  When I spend His money on other people....all of a sudden, prayer becomes necessary.  So....I'm afraid I have wasted His money then prayed about helping His people.

Please understand, none of those things I have purchased are bad.....I have them because God has been so generous with me, that my family has more than we even really need.  However, my focus is all wrong.  I should be helping His people first....then deciding what extra "goodies" we should have.  I love anything Coach.....but He has done far more for me than Coach ever will.  I love having my nails done....but the work God has done in my heart thru Dr. Smith's preaching makes me prettier than sparkly purple nails ever will....because those heart changes make me more like Him.  Anything that makes me more like Him.....should take precedence over any new toy or monetary gain.  So today, my friend.....if you, like me...have found yourself in this position.  I encourage you to change your focus.  I need us to put on some sparkly sunglasses that have Jesus lenses....lenses that help us see His work that needs to be done, before our own wants or needs.  After all, I do love Him...and just like He told Peter....I should feed His sheep.